Sunday Night Routine, Maintenance & Hand Holding

Last week I asked for suggestions to help our Sunday nights go smoother. Thanks for the ideas and the positive encouragement and for sharing your experiences! We made some changes this weekend and it really seemed to help, so I wanted to let you know what we did.

Usually Michael leaves his preparations for the work week until Sunday night. There have been many times when I’ve been ready to snuggle and cling to him for a bit after the kids have gone to bed, but he’s had stuff to do first. That generally wouldn’t leave me in a good place emotionally. I would feel like he was already in work mode and like our weekend had come to a premature end. It felt like he was withdrawing and so I’d withdraw too. Then when he was ready he’d want to enjoy the last bit of our time together, but I would be upset. He would usually persist in trying to reach me, trying to breach the walls I was building and too often I would try to keep him out until I couldn’t anymore and then I’d end up acting out. And there have been other times when by the time he was done with his work week preparations one or both of us were just too tired and it would end up feeling like a lost opportunity.

So, this weekend, Michael decided to get things done before Sunday night rolled around. That way, once the kids were in bed, the rest of the night was just for the two of us. It was wonderful. We got to just enjoy the last of the weekend together without any of that angst that had been plaguing us on Sunday nights. He didn’t go into work mode prematurely and I didn’t withdraw and get upset.

There was something else different about this weekend as well…no maintenance. Michael normally administers a maintenance spanking once a week. As you probably know, he’s spanking me every night that he’s home now. And so having a specific maintenance spanking seems a bit superfluous. He just addresses things as needed now, not waiting for a specific night or spanking. The nightly spankings vary, depending on his mood, on what I need, if there’s anything in specific that needs to be addressed, etc. It’s actually working quite well for us. It has eliminated inconsistency and the emotional turmoil surrounding that issue. And we’re benefiting from the every day (that he’s home) connection.

So, that’s a bit of an update on us and the changes we’ve been making and how things are going. Oh, my husband has also been doing a bit of hand holding…my hand of course. I’m moving forward with plans regarding the medical procedure that I need (the one that Michael went to the consultation with me for). I’ve gone through a wide range of emotions about the whole thing. I know I’ll be fine, better off actually, but this is something I’ve been putting off as long as possible (well, I’ve been putting it off too long really) and the time has come to face it head on. I don’t know how I’d get through it without Michael by my side, holding my hand and calming my fears. I don’t have a date yet, but it will be sooner rather than later. That will be good for my health and for my fears (in the whole getting it over and done with and moving onto the healing aspect). Prayers are appreciated and I’m sure you’ll hear more about it before I actually have it done because I’m likely to need people to talk me off the ledge. lol


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