He's Got My Back...side!

As you probably know, I’ve been struggling a bit lately. And when I say “a bit” what I really mean is a lot. I’ve been stressed and trying to deal with it, but I’ve ended up suppressing way too much and as Susie says, it ends up coming out sideways. I really hate that. Michael is the one who gets the brunt of it unfortunately, because he’s my safe place, my soft place to land. I know that he’ll always love me and have my back, no matter what. But, what has become increasingly apparent is that he’ll always have my backside as well!

He’s been a lot stricter with me lately. Wiggle room is hard to come by. He stops me in my tracks when he sees me looking at that line in the sand, just contemplating crossing it. So many times lately he’s rolled me over or bent me over and given me several smacks to get my attention, to get me back on track. It probably sounds annoying, but honestly, it’s been really helpful. It’s just what I need from him right now.

You see, I’ve been feeling a bit ungrounded, somewhat out of control, a bit lost and wandering. I’ve needed some attention, some guidance, some watching over. I’ve needed more direction than usual. I’ve needed to feel that those guardrails that keep me safe are firmly in place. And once we talked about things and both realized what I needed, Michael was quick to step up to the task at hand.

I struggled a bit with it at first. There’s that little voice in my head that tells me that I shouldn’t need his help, that I am strong and that I can do this on my own. But the truth is, we’re both at our best when we’re working as a team. And guess what? Team mates help each other. They don’t rely solely on themselves. That’s just not how a team works. Sometimes it’s him needing help from me. Do I feel like he’s a burden to me when that happens? Absolutely not! So why should I feel like a burden when I need his help? Exactly. I shouldn’t.

So, my bottom has been getting a bit more attention than usual lately…but that has also lead to other parts getting more attention as well…not such a bad thing if you ask me. *wink*

Michael wasn’t home on Valentine’s Day, but he was home the night before, so we exchanged cards and gifts then. He gave me a wonderful gift set with my favorite perfume in spray form for home and another little solid version to carry in my purse, some scented lotion and shower gel and some lip shine. He also gave me a really sweet card that he wrote a little note in. Oh, and some vanilla heart peeps! I love peeps and the vanilla ones are particularly yummy. I know, I know, they’re way too sweet and I wouldn’t want them often, but I enjoy them when I do have them.

I gave Michael a card that I thought was really fitting for where we are now in our relationship, with the growth we’ve had since we incorporated ttwd and I wrote a little note in it as well. As far as a gift goes, he told me not to get him anything. But, I knew he’d get me something and the idea of not getting him anything didn’t sit well with me. And so, I tried to figure out what I could get him that hopefully he wouldn’t be upset about me spending money on. I ended up getting a really cute babydoll style nightie. You see, once upon a time I used to sleep naked. But then we had kids. Sleeping naked isn’t conducive to getting up numerous times a night with a little one, at least not in my opinion. And so I started wearing pajamas to bed. And I’ve been wearing them to bed ever since (well, different pjs, not the exact same ones, lol). I modeled the new nightie and he loved it! He wasn’t even upset that I had bought something. Phew! And he decided that he’d like it if I wear it to bed sometimes, but that he’d like it even better in a heap on the floor. lol Men! Gotta love ‘em! :)


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