Right Beside You

I could really relate to June's post today, Tested. I imagine many of you can as well. As I said to June in my comment to her post, I recently told God that I was trusting him to lead my husband and I told Michael that I was trusting him to follow God's lead. It's hard not to fall into old patterns though, to want to step up myself and take over. But, that isn't my role. I'm here and I'm ready...ready to do whatever needs to be done, ready to help in whatever way I can. But, I'm not on the front lines. I'm in a support position.

That's an adjustment for me. When things are going well and the sailing is pretty smooth, it's not a big deal really. But when the fog rolls in and it's hard to see where we're going and when those waves start to toss and turn the boat, well, that makes stepping back and letting my husband lead quite challenging.

In the past I had a tendency to shove him out of the way and take over. And he was used to me doing so and stepping back to get out of my way before he got hurt. Neither of us were really happy when that scenario played out, but it was a pattern that developed and it's been one that's been hard to break.

Some current circumstances have sort of forced our hand in that area though. It's been a bit of a tennis match at times. Picture Michael and I playing doubles together. The ball comes over the net and is headed toward him, but I lunge for it, only realizing at the last minute what I was doing. So, I stop in my tracks and fail to hit the ball. In the meantime he had started forward, but then saw me and stopped. But by the time he realized that I had stopped and was conceding that the ball was his he was unable to get to it in time. And the end result was that we both dropped the ball. I'm not sure if he didn't start forward confidently and quickly or if I never even gave him the chance and just took over. I imagine it's been a mixture of both.



On another note (pun intended), I've had a song stuck in my head for a few days now. Well, actually, I've had a melody stuck in my head, no lyrics, a small part of a song. I've been trying to figure out what song it was and finally today I hummed it to my daughter and she figured it out. She played it for me while I looked up the lyrics and I was once again amazed at how God uses music to speak to my soul. If you're struggling right now for any reason, I think this song will speak to you as well.


Right Beside You
Building 429, featuring Dawn Michele from Fireflight

I've seen it and felt it
Hopelessness with no lifeline
The wicked are feeding on
Innocence and our decline

You and I we are the same
Torn apart by different things
All our faith is barely alive
But we're going to make it through the night
I want you to know

When the world is on your back
And you think that you will never last
When you're lonely and you are confused
I'll be right beside you
When the walls are closing in
And you think you'd rather sink than swim
When you think there's nothing left for you to lose
I'll be right beside you
I'll be with you

We are precious
More than priceless is our worth
Loved by the Father
Heaven's children here on earth
You and I we are the same
Lifted up above the pain
By it's wounds we have been healed
And by our love it is revealed
I want you to know (I need you to know)

When the world is on your back
And you think that you will never last
When you're lonely and you are confused
I'll be right beside you
When the walls are closing in
And you think you'd rather sink than swim
When there's nothing left for you to lose
I'll be right beside you

Hold on, don't you let go of me
I'll be here through it all
Hold on, when you're ready to fall
I will carry you
I will never leave you
I will lift you if you fall

When the world is on your back
And you think that you will never last
When you're lonely and you are confused
I'll be right beside you
When the walls are closing in
And you think you'd rather sink than swim
When there's nothing left for you to lose
I'll be right beside you
I'll be with you
I'll be right beside you

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