Tonight's Submission Exercise
Sometimes Michael has me do things when he’s away. You could call them submission exercises. It can be anything really. The point is that he tells me to do whatever it is and I have to follow through. Tonight as I sit here typing, I’m wearing my teal lacy bra and panty set under my pjs. Why? Because Michael told me to put them on after the kids went to bed and wear them for 45 minutes. Well, actually, I asked if I could wait until after the kids went to bed and he said that I could. I had to text him when I put them on and I have to text him again when I take them off.
Sometimes he’s told me to put my necklace on and wear it for awhile. Many times he’s told me get an implement out and sit naked on the bed with it for a period of time, thinking about our dynamic and when and why he’s used that implement. Sometimes he’s had me spend some time in the corner. There has been at least one time when a butt plug was involved. I never really know what he’ll
ask of me tell me to do.
I always experience a mixture of emotions when he instructs me to do any of these things. He gives me the tasks for various reasons, but it always boils down to getting me in the right headspace. At the beginning I usually feel silly, like the task is ridiculous, pointless. And I often get antsy at some point in the middle. But somehow by the end I almost always end up feeling much calmer, much more centered, more submissive, and closer to my husband.
Okay, 15 minutes left. Yes, I’ve reached the antsy part. This is the point where I entertain the idea of stopping early. I’m often tempted to completely rebel. But, I know if I make myself push through and focus on why he’s having me do whatever it is, then I’ll feel a lot better by the end. I start to pay attention to my breathing and focus on whatever object he’s picked out for me. Tonight it’s the bra and panties. He told me to make sure the bra was on nice and tight. He said he wanted it to remind me of him holding me very tightly. So now is the point where I start to really focus on that. My breathing has slowed and I’m very aware of how the bra especially, but the panties also, feel. I’m thinking of him pulling me to him and holding me tightly, of him kissing me deeply, claiming me. My breathing has slowed to the point where I have to remind myself to take some deep breaths. I’m picturing his hand on my throat and perhaps his other hand is pinching one of my nipples. I’m imagining myself looking into his eyes, the dominance and passion I see taking my breath away. I’m thinking of how much I miss him and how much I’m looking forward to seeing him tomorrow. I’m thinking about how I’ve disappointed him this week with my attitude and how sorry I am about that. But, I know that he’ll be happy to see me and that the slate will be wiped clean and I won’t have to live with that feeling of guilt after it’s been dealt with. Time is almost up. And now I almost don’t want it to end, though I admit that I am watching the clock. I’m feeling very calm now and falling asleep in his arms sounds lovely...tomorrow night, that’s not long to have to wait. I hope I can hang onto this feeling. Oh, it’s time.
Okay, I took them off and I sent Michael a text, “Task complete, Sir. I love you!” He’s probably asleep by now, but he’ll see it in the morning. I hope when he does that he’s pleased.
It’s time for me to go to bed too. Sweet dreams my friends! I hope you have a wonderful weekend!