Friendships


Since starting our journey with ttwd I’ve made some new friendships and I’m thankful for them.  These new friends are also in DD relationships, so we can talk to each other about this journey, lift one another up, gently point out where perhaps we’re going wrong or not thinking clearly, lend an ear to listen, comfort one another when things just aren’t going smoothly, etc.  I’m hoping to be able to meet up with a couple of these new friends actually, at some point, when the timing is right.  I think it will be fun.  : )

As much as I appreciate these new friendships and hope that they’ll grow, I’ve been feeling more distant from other friends, pre-DD friends.  Ttwd has been a big part of my life since last September and yet I can’t share about it with these friends.  I've talked with one close friend about Michael and I working on our relationship, making some changes.  I’ve shared a little bit about the new dynamic between Michael and I, but with no mention of the discipline aspect of our relationship of course.  She didn’t react negatively.  She seemed to find it interesting, but we didn’t really talk about it much.  I think it was sort of an “ok, whatever floats your boat, hope it goes well, yada, yada, yada” kind of thing actually.  I’m not sure she really knew what to think about it, just that she wants us to be happy.

As we get further along in our DD journey I find that I’m starting to make some changes, in regard to how I feel about some things and in my behavior as a result.  These changes have made me uncomfortable at times when with certain pre-DD friends.  There have been times when their joking has turned into husband bashing, meant in fun, with the husbands right there laughing along.  I have to admit that at times I've joined in, with a wary eye on Michael, to see if he was upset by it or not.  Other times I’ve tried to stay out of it or turn the conversation in another direction, without being too overt about it.  I don’t know what to do really.  As such I’ve distanced myself a bit from these friends.  It makes me a bit sad actually.  I wonder if this is just an adjustment period or if this is the beginning of the end of some of these friendships.

I’m curious, have your friendships changed since you incorporated ttwd into your marriage/relationship?  If so, in what way?  Did some friends fall by the wayside?  Why do you think that was?

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