To Tell or Not to Tell

That is the question.  After finding out that DD is essentially passed down in Christina’s husband’s family and after reading Abby’s post The Telling, I found myself thinking about whether ttwd is something we’ll explain to our kids at some point. 

I admit that I have thought about sharing my post Relinquishing Control with our teenage daughter.  I don’t talk about the discipline aspect of DD in it, but I do discuss the power structure we’ve embraced and the reasons for it.  If I do share it with her, I think I'll wait until she's at least a bit older.  Our son is younger and so we have no plans to say anything to him at this point either.

As for sharing with them about the discipline aspect of ttwd, well, I’d rather not.  Having said that, there have been a couple of times when I’ve been worried about our daughter overhearing.  I don’t actually know for sure whether she has or not.  It seems likely due to the circumstances, but she hasn’t said anything about it and we haven’t either.  It’s something that does upset me though…the thought of either of them hearing.  We try to wait until they’re fast asleep, but there have been a few times when we’ve gone upstairs while the kids were busy downstairs playing video games or on the computer or whatever.

If we knew for sure that our daughter overheard us, I suppose we’d have to say something.  I hope our hand isn’t forced like that though.  And I hope that she hasn't overheard and that she won’t, or her brother either for that matter.  This house has gotten smaller as the kids have gotten bigger.  Somehow I hadn’t anticipated that.  I thought we’d have more space.  I mean, when they’re little all their toys are BIG and as they get older all their stuff gets smaller.  However, as they get older they get bigger, and more aware of everything going on around them, and have a knack for being in the wrong place at the wrong time and not hearing whatever you want them to hear and hearing whatever you don’t want them to hear!

So, I’m curious.  Have you told your kids about ttwd?  If so, are you glad that you did or did you wish afterward that you hadn’t?  If not, do you plan to at some point?


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