I don’t think I’ve mentioned that Michael is away from home often. He’s been gone 3 days now and I have another 2 before I get to see him. This is nothing new. It’s been this way for a long time. Some weeks he’s home more often and other weeks, not so much. And yes, it’s due to his work, his employment, his career, his job…you get the idea. ; )
Him being gone so much has been hard on our relationship in some ways. I have to be very independent because he’s not here. Generally speaking that’s not a problem…at least, not until he comes home. Then he’s used to being on his own all week and I’m used to being on my own all week and meshing back together as a couple can be messy.
I think a big part of the problem is that we’ve often let there be too much of a disconnect come between us when he’s away. For instance, there have been days when we won’t have communicated at all, all day long, until he calls to say goodnight. But, he does always call to say goodnight. : ) That little communication isn’t good for any relationship though. And because I would find myself longing for him, I would put up a wall and tell myself that I didn’t need him. I was trying to protect myself from feeling hurt by his absence. I know it’s been hard on him as well, but it’s not something we really talk about…it just…is.
Now, this may surprise you, but I think that this is a big part of the reason why we’ve implemented DD into our relationship. Did I just lose you? Let me try to explain.
Ok, so there’s this disconnect between us. I’m doing my own thing. He’s doing his own thing. If my focus hasn't been on him all week and if he’s just been focused on himself and his stuff all week, how are we supposed to come back together? What do the dynamics of that look like? Well, often times it hasn’t been pretty. As much as both of us looked forward to seeing each other, we have had a hard time coming back together as a couple when we’ve been so independent all week. (little niggling thought…perhaps it’s really been more my problem, giving up that control…but let’s not dwell on that just now, ok?) What if there were expectations, rules, and consequences when rules are broken. Hmmm…for that to work it would mean that we’d have to be paying attention to one another, even when we’re apart. (Do you see where I’m going with this?) I’d have to have be mindful of him if I’m going to make sure I’m doing what’s expected of me. And he’d have to have me on his mind if he’s going to hold me accountable.
Ok, so why does spanking have to be a part of this? Well, it really doesn’t…at least not for you maybe. lol Seriously though, there are a lot of other things that couples might choose. It’s just that for us, spanking as a sort of playful banter, as erotic play, or as maintenance or discipline just works.
To tell you the truth though, it’s not always about spanking. Right now I’d love to just be cuddled up in his arms and forget about the rest of the world for a little while. I love you Sir, and I miss you. <3